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Kisstopher707 Funny Status Messages
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Hey douchebag. Women like men with an accent, not an Axe scent
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10
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07-17-2013 12:53 by
Kisstopher707
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Pets are so easy to love. They are honest and react to kindness without wanting to know what's in your bank. Humans could take a lesson.
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07-18-2013 14:53 by
Kisstopher707
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My wife said she expects the house to be clean by the time she walks in the door so I changed all of the locks.
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07-22-2013 13:05 by
Kisstopher707
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Don't litter your chaos and drama all over other people's lives.
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07-23-2013 12:54 by
Kisstopher707
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Vodka can be mixed with anything, including more vodka.
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07-23-2013 13:11 by
Kisstopher707
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Stay in that position I just got a Facebook Notification.
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07-26-2013 02:39 by
Kisstopher707
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If Internet Explorer has the balls to ask you to set it as your default browser, don’t tell me that you don’t have the guts to ask her out.
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07-30-2013 12:59 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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Fellas; If your fiancé designs her own engagement ring, prepare for a life of sex on your birthday and holidays only.
20
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08-10-2013 11:51 by
Kisstopher707
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Hell hath no fury like a Facebook friend deleted and blocked.
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08-13-2013 13:19 by
Kisstopher707
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We used to watch the news to find out the truth. If you're looking for the truth now, the last thing you'd want to watch is the news.
58
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08-18-2013 11:40 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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Yes girl you can cook, give great head, have a great sense of fashion, are kind, beautiful, sexy, and have a great smile but can you twerk?
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08-19-2013 12:16 by
Kisstopher707
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What if they made a Kindle that doesn't run out of battery? Like, a book.
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08-23-2013 01:25 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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"Let me put you in a better mood" - vodka
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08-25-2013 12:21 by
Kisstopher707
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If you like her, tell her. Don't friendzone yourself. Have some balls. Be a man.
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08-27-2013 14:05 by
Kisstopher707
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twerking just shaking your ass? Why did we need a new word? Ass-shaking has served us well for centuries.
47
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08-27-2013 14:16 by
Kisstopher707
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Whenever I move into a new neighborhood, the first thing I familiarize myself with is the liquor store coz you know priorities.
22
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08-27-2013 14:20 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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Not to brag or anything, but my bank balance is over $100k (the k is silent).
27
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08-28-2013 01:37 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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“Go out there and get your ass kicked by Steven Seagul” - Script for everyone else in a Steven Seagal movie.
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08-28-2013 13:14 by
Kisstopher707
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Women just don't get it, That men just don't get it.
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09-05-2013 12:13 by
Kisstopher707
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0
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How to spot single girls: If you hit on her and a man beats you, she has a boyfriend. If you hit her and she pepper sprays you, she's single.
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09-08-2013 08:14 by
Kisstopher707
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