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God please give me the power to walk away when another god wants to take your place!
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06-08-2011 13:56
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I can't wait to see who gets fired next week on Celebrity Appresident.
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03-17-2018 00:33
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Cain killed Abel by bashing him over the head with a rock. Guns would not be invented for another 8000 years or so.
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06-21-2015 12:16
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9:03. North snores as Kanye sings a lullaby. Furious, Kanye claps & she jumps awake. "You think you can fall asleep during my performance?"
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09-15-2015 12:53
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Why does Ellen DeGeneres like dressing like Mr. Rogers?
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01-11-2014 00:56
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Define FREE you over-leveraged, bankrupt, healthcare inflated, morbidly obese, war monguering, globally ignorant, media slaves?
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02-04-2014 08:57
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I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: it before.
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07-28-2014 05:10 by
andrew jackson
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The dallas Ebola case turned out to be a false alarm. Apparently the person had just went to Taco Bell the night before.
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10-01-2014 10:35
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Black Friday: The day you spend hundreds of dollars on possessions to celebrate the birth of a man who didn't believe in possessions.
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11-28-2014 20:15
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religion is basically believing that there's a guy who is watching over you if you give him some of your money on Sundays.
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11-25-2014 01:38
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Remember when Ronald Reagan was president, we also had Bob Hope and Johnny Cash still with us...now we have Obama and no hope and no cash
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11-24-2009 22:14
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still sore from dropping the soap
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08-24-2008 21:42
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I just bought a pack of Condoms and the cashier asked me, "Sir do you need a bag"; I replied, "Na! She ain't that ugly". :)
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12-13-2012 15:36 by
SANTA
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If you lost $10,000.00 dollars, all hundreds, held together in a roll with a rubber band, give me a call. I found your rubber band. You just need to identify it.
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06-12-2012 20:31 by
Jerry Carter
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How many of you cowards would go deer hunting if the deer could shoot back?
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08-31-2011 02:41
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We get it... You don't like Obama. Quit with the Obama is like a penny sh#t. You forget every Politician is like a penny, 2 faced and worthless
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01-05-2014 19:47
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That's great and all. But the question is, can you hold that yoga pose while I'm inside you?
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12-12-2013 07:43
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My Mexican waiter put my food down in front of another white man who looked nothing like me. So I totally get it now. Oh wait that's not my waiter.
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01-03-2014 15:40 by
HiYourJon
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Black Friday: That day we spend hundreds of dollars on material goods to celebrate the birth of a man who didn't believe in material goods.
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11-27-2015 12:28
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Healthcare.gov got 99 problems and glitches are all of them...
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10-23-2013 18:35
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