Funny Status Messages

View All Funny Status Messages

Sort:  Recent   |   Oldest   |   Rating
Trump Filter: ON | OFF


Search Messages:
Page: 4323 of 5594

   messageicon Just when you thought kids were actually beginning to enter into the world of reality ................ Pokemon GO
←Rate | 07-12-2016 13:17 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pokemon Go - Get your information stolen and get hit by a car.
←Rate | 07-12-2016 14:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Three kinds of Betty Crocker cake mix are being voluntarily recalled by General Mills over concerns they could be contaminated with E.coli. Now that's an exciting new cake flavor if you ask me.
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know those orange cones they put on the highway for you to knock down? I just beat my high score !
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:06 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This morning I thanked the Starbucks barista and told him to have a magical day and the lady next to me waiting for coffee stared and said, "I could really use some magic today, could you wish me a magical day too?" Lady, sorry I am not a magician here...
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Being in Costco without family or friends is like being lost in a strange universe. Who am I going to share the poutine with?
←Rate | 07-12-2016 16:15 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Wonder if it would become a national tragedy if a Pokemon Go Character appeared in the middle of a busy freeway?
←Rate | 07-12-2016 19:09 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The weather today was good enough for me to feel ashamed about my body.
←Rate | 07-12-2016 23:02 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Bernie Sanders' campaign has had more endings than The Lord Of The Rings.
←Rate | 07-13-2016 22:05 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Holy Crap ..... I just found a Pokemon in my Toilet!!!
←Rate | 07-14-2016 00:42 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Pokemon is the Japanese word for Revenge.
←Rate | 07-14-2016 09:53 Comments (0)  


   messageicon "But apart from that , How did you enjoy the play Mrs. Lincoln"
←Rate | 07-15-2016 12:33 Comments (0)  


   messageicon ... it's so damn HOT out there I'm not even going out to look for Pokemon.
←Rate | 07-15-2016 15:20 Comments (0)  


   messageicon This Pokemon Go app is getting way too serious ..... My doctor said he found a Pokemon in my Chest X-Ray
←Rate | 07-15-2016 15:25 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Question: Is sexual healing covered by Obamacare?
←Rate | 07-16-2016 05:46 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Haven't tried heroin yet, but I imagine the rush is like remembering I have pie in the fridge.
←Rate | 07-16-2016 06:00 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Oxygen was discovered in 1772.... what did people breathe before then?
←Rate | 07-16-2016 16:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just heard on the radio that former child star McCauley Culkin may soon get married for a second time...... I guess he was tired of being "Home Alone."
←Rate | 07-16-2016 16:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Stop checking my Status , Go and love your GF
←Rate | 07-17-2016 01:13 by Jouhar Sayed Comments (0)  


   messageicon Females don't want much from you except your time, attention, space, food, shirts, fun, bed covers, genitals, passwords, credit cards, life and soul.
←Rate | 07-17-2016 04:46 Comments (0)  



Submit your own funny facebook status message here:
Name:
Status Message:

... characters left