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I am tired of thinking for myself, bring on the socialism. 
Some people should keep their Quran and their bibles like they keep their genitals: to themselves.
My boyfriend told me that he was seeing someone else because he was fed up with my bad habits. I nearly choked on my toenail.
thinks people should create their own party instead of complaining about everyone in power.
I cook with wine...Sometimes I even put it in the food !
There was a piece of chocolate cake in the fridge and a note, "Don't eat me." Now there's an empty plate and a note, Don't tell me what to do.
A good woman will do 70 chores around the house. Cooking and 69
Britney Spears looks so old and ugly...yikes!
Valentines Day is so fake. If you love a girl you'll treat her special every day. Not once out of 365 days!
Sitting on the toilet growing a tail.
If god didn't want us smoking weed, then why the f*%k did he put THC in it?
The days when men knew how to treat women were the days when women knew their place.
Mexico has the same problem the US has.........Too many mexicans.
ObamaCare: Prescription for disaster.
BEER - Helping white men dance since 1881.
if Charles is in Charge of our days and our nights, who's this God guy people are talking about?
Wondering what's gonna happen to that Hindu ass wipe from Rutgers College who played a prank on the poor guy who committed suicide when he goes to prison! I wish the guards secretly tapes Ravi getting raped and put it on the web
I would consider becoming Catholic if they made Batman Pope.
UPDATE: I'm still handsome.
What's with everyone calling it "Holiday decorations" back in my day, we called it a little something like Christmas. 