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Teaching my Son Life-Lessons.... Don't download porn.... Stream it.... 
without me awesome is only aweso
says that nothing is IMPOSSIBLE, the word itself says I'M POSSIBLE !
wonders if people who use sign language are allowed to talk with their mouth full....
parachute for sale, used once, never opened!
thinks that your a great friend but when we're running from the zombies is gonna trip you.
Jon Gosselin's secret lover
a feeling that tonight's gonna be a good good night
Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle
playin twister with a colorblind midget stripper called rainbow
Don't cha wish your boyfriend was Hot like me
Soooo Happy With His Sexy Baby
Going To THe Moon BRB
had the meaning of life but forgot to write it down.
's insurance doesn't cover PMS
working 40 hours a week to be this poor.
"I've found Jesus. He was behind the sofa the whole time. "
jump off the bridge before I push you myself!
touching himself inappropriately while watching Rachel Ray cook bratwurst.
getting naked and playing twister with a monkey! 