Funny Status Messages

   Shark Week is over, but I'm not taking down my decorations

   starting a new cult for idiots and making Kool Aid

   has anyone ever checked out their reflection in the side of their car and thought "damn I would make one sexy ass midget!"

   If it's worth it, fight for it & if you lose it, at least you tried.

   Thinks the invention of the credit/debit card, homeless people must be pissed.. do you take visa does not sound as good as a couple quarters bouncin in a cup!

   Kama Sutra has finally been published as an audio book. Unfortunatly the audio is provided by Gilbert Gottfried.

   once had his Ex crawling toward him on her hands and knees. The thing is, he was under the bed hiding and she was crawling toward him screaming "Come out and fight like a man!"

   I was just thinking. How many people have been killed in the name of Atheism? Also, how many wars have been started in the name of Atheism? Are there any suicide bombing Atheists out there? Hmm.

   reminds you that anything unrelated to elephants is *ahem*...irrelephant.

   Run faster I hear banjos!!!!

   Went to a restaurant... the drinks waiter gave me drinks, the food waiter gave me food. ... then the Head waiter came over....

   My gift horse is facing the wrong way

   I want a woman not some little girl, that had to grow up in daddy's big world.

   Everytime I see that Megan Fox on that tv screen of mine, it sure gets a rise out of me.

   Just because you're old and ugly, doesn't give you the right to be rude.

   I wanna hit the like button then unlike to let you know I =never liked in the first place

   wondering if Hootie and the Blowfish had another name in mind in case that was one taken

   WOOP WOOP! *HI-5* to the facebook developers, adding in *BLOCK EVENT INVITES* and not only a *BLOCK APPLICATIONS* section. YEWWW! it's going from SPAMBOOK back to FACEBOOK! to all my friends that are promoters. GIVE IT YOUR BEST SHOT!!! hahaha SUCKERS!

   statistically, you're twice as likely to be killed by a tipped vending machine than by a shark attack. which makes me wonder why there isn't a "vending machine week"

   I think I'm missing a point :| ----->>> ... .....