Funny Status Messages and Tweets
Funny Status Messages for Facebook, Discord, and Whatsapp and funny tweets for Twitter.
Page: 5882 of 6370
trying to figure out where deleted data off your mobile phone goes...?
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06-02-2010 11:16
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I bought a dog and named him Stay. Poor thing gets confused when I call him "Come here,Stay!" "Come here,Stay!"
constantly amazed at how peoples lips keep moving when they are talking through their arses !!!
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06-02-2010 09:43
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The Chinese are so advanced in technology, that they are already selling "Fifa World Cup 2010, South Africa - All the goals and highlights"
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06-02-2010 09:00 by Mduduzi
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If the world were a logical place, men would ride sidesaddle.
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06-02-2010 08:01
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OK, I'm not sure what button I hit on Facebook's privacy settings, but I just found Mark Zuckerberg in my home going through my photo albums
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06-02-2010 04:23 by l33t
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the world is hilarious, first swine flu then justin bieber then oil spill?!
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06-02-2010 04:05
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I had a stick of CareFree gum, but it didn't work. I felt pretty good while I was blowing that bubble, but as soon as the gum lost its flavor, I was back to pondering my mortality.
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06-01-2010 23:57 by flinnie
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allergic to wasps and arrogant people.
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06-01-2010 22:48
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My wife tells me I have A.D.D., that stands for Attention Deficit, hey it's beginning to storm outside.
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06-01-2010 22:47
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my drinking team has a football problem
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06-01-2010 22:38 by one
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When you were a kid, your biggest decision was "Duck Hunt or Mario Bros."
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06-01-2010 22:32 by Joser
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I'd like to kick Murphy's @ss for making any laws.
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06-01-2010 22:30 by Joser
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The truth shall set ye free. But lying shall get ye a bunch of free sh*t.
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06-01-2010 22:29 by Joser
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I am not a control freak. I prefer the term "predictability enthusiast".
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06-01-2010 22:06 by Joser
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She had a Coca-Cola body....too bad it was the 2-Liter version.
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06-01-2010 21:27 by Danmanz
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I had to separate the Aunt Jemima and the Uncle Ben in my pantry. Ben won't keep his hands off those big flapjacks..
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06-01-2010 20:48 by heZz
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Had Mexican for dinner last night and just used a BP restroom. Let's just say we're almost even.
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06-01-2010 20:23 by Vito
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With "Lost" and "American Idol" finished what am I supposed to do with my life, I guess I'll go enjoy that hot orange thing in the sky!
wondering if the Phillys and Blackhawks players wives are not shaving either
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06-01-2010 17:21
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