Goodeolboy Funny Status Messages

   Setting up eggs on the fence and letting the kids shoot at 'em with paintball guns. That's how we do it in the country!

   You know if you roll down fast and steady enough, it gives the illusion of electric windows.

   I hate when I'm sitting on bleachers and Half my nutsack falls asleep!WTF

   I'll baffle them with brilliance, then I'll let you talk.

   The workin man blues, is being wide awake before 5am on your day off.

   Shout out to all the deadbeat dads and sperm donors this Father's Day. Unbeknownst to you, there are kids everywhere that are becoming AMAZING PEOPLE because they want to be nothing like you.

   as of today I will no longer use "lol" after my comments or posts...I will now use "snicker".

   so really..what was Meatloaf talking about when he sang he'll do anything for love, but he wont do that?

   utilizing a fake phone call to avoid being solicited at the pump.

   You know you're country, when the smell of a dairy reminds you of Oreos.

   Just rubbed the blue dot from the National Enquirer (fingers crossed).

   . "I have come here to chew bubblegum and kick ass... and I'm all out of bubblegum."

   I quit smoking by switching to sunflower seeds. Cured my smoking habit, but now I have a strange desire to want to sh!t on newspaper...

   Today, I ask that everyone read my posts in the voice of Forrest Gump.

   It would be a good day if one could afford to even shoot their Ak ;)

   Heads up folks. Apparently the little AAA stickers don't count as "proof" of insurance. That is all...

   Kind of shocked more professional fisherman aren't driving metal flaked vehicles as well.

   Today is the day in some households, that colored eggs get dumped in the trash. Because enough is enough.

   To the guy next to me at the rest-area urinal...The fact that you still have your sunglasses on kinda creeps me out.

   Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are getting weak?