hihuggiehi Funny Status Messages

   it sad that the plans I make after work depend on how much charge I have left in my phone battery?

   Here's an original idea: Invent a mirror that reflects the way others see you so you won't be blinded by your opinion of your reflection

   I think all Walmart bathrooms are required by law to look like the set of one of the "Saw" movies.

   They should make a car that can text you when the car ahead of you brakes.....

   Waxing every inch of male body hair is still more masculine than saying the word 'Man-scaping.'

   The saddest part of the recession is all of the laid-off workers at the C+C Music Factory

   I desperately need a "hide political posts" button on Facebook so I can still like all my friends after the election year is over.

   My new year's resolution is to improve my powers of concentra......... oh look a squirrel

   My pre-nup will indicate that I'm allowed to unplug her life support system should my phone need charging....

   When I'm drunk I just hit any buttons and put my faith in autocorrect.

   Merry Christmas! Or as my grandma always says, "there are whispers coming from the poinsettia again."

   So How long do I microwave these teenage turtles before I can teach them karate ?

   Love is like working out it hurts really bad until you just give up and eat a cake.

   There are men in this world who have killed sharks with their bare hands. I can't even touch a picture of a bug in a book.

   Ralph Macchio is 50. Pat Morita was 52 when the Karate Kid opened,,,,fact check next time!