Monday Funny Status Messages

   How is Monday the 13th not as scary as Friday the 13th?!

   Now Russia is accusing Russia of meddling in Russia's internal affairs, and is demanding Russia register as a foreign agent by Monday.

   "Friday" is an old Indian word that means "Just two more days until Monday."

   Another good feeling. Waking up and realizing that it's sunday and not monday morning. AAAAAH......zzzzzzz.

   . The Afghanistan address trump gave monday was very similar to one that Obama gave. Trump needs to get a new speech writer.

   Can't wait, after Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday's Trump fiasco, I'm so looking forward to SNL this Saturday. It's going to be an awesome show.

   Short term goal, today get past annoying Monday and Monday's close friends, Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday before hanging out with Friday and Friday's hot friends Saturday and Sunday.

   I've got big plans for the weekend. If things go well, come Monday morning I'm gonna need a chiropractor, a psychiatrist, a priest and bail money.

   Turns out if you fake your death every monday work catches on.

   Daylight Savings Time: I say start it on a Monday at 5 pm. You wouldn't lose the hour on Sunday, and it would shorten Monday.

   DAAAAY-OH! DAAaay-oh! Monday come and me wanna go home.

   If my week was a YouTube video, Monday would be that crappy ad that it doesn't let you skip.

   A cigarette shortens life by 2 min,a beer shortens life by 4 minutes,a Monday at work shortens life by 8 hours

   May your clothes be comfy. your coffee strong and your Monday short.

   How I love #Monday. On a different subject. Have you ever met someone for the first time and wanted to buy them a toaster for their bathtub?

   ... Just been watching Ladies Olympic Beach Volleyball and there has already been a wrist injury .... But I should be OK by Monday

   Scott Baio speaks at the GOP convention on Monday and the creator of Happy Days dies on Tuesday. Coincidence? I think not.

   Friday the 13th is still better than Monday the whatever.

   To be honest, I'm just not that into you, Monday.

   My favorite holiday is, National Egg Salad Lunch Monday. . .