wolf Funny Status Messages

   Gas stations need to have a happy hour..

   Surviving this massive amount of "family time" by pretending they are mental patients and I'm their case manager.

   Alright, who left the bag of idiots open..

   Somthing always tells me, be camera ready when I go into Walmart..

   First the doctor gave me the good news: I was going to have a disease named after me..

   Remember as we are planing for our tomorrows, our brave soilders are giving theirs today.. Have a safe an wonderful Memorial weekend everyone!!

   Satan called, he wants his weather back..

   planning to do something today, but I haven't finished doing nothing from yesterday. Maybe I should be a politician..

   How many Snickers are an acceptable meal replacement?

   I've been calling this random number asking for John all day with diffrent voices.. When I get home I'm going to call him back and say "this is John, do I have any messages"..

   Guess we should have been more specific about wanting a government shake up..

   Live,Laugh, Love if that doesn't work- Raise, Aim and Fire..

   Next time someone tells you that you look familiar,tell them you wore a condom!

   If you want bright eyed and bushy tailed, go chase a squirrel!

   Nothing says your celebrating the birth of are Nation, like the smell of Gunpowder and Beer..

   If I were you, I'd get a helmet and some crayon's and call it a day..

   X Did you Just say somthing, or did your brain fart..

   An intellectual is a person who's found one thing that's more interesting than sex.

   When in doubt, whip it out..

   The only Royal Crown I'm interested in at 4am is some Crown Royal..