Sully Funny Status Messages

   Occupy North Pole, because Santa loves the rich kids more.........

   Rams Call List: 1. B̶r̶e̶t̶t̶ ̶F̶a̶v̶r̶e̶, 2. T̶e̶r̶r̶y̶ ̶B̶r̶a̶d̶s̶h̶a̶w̶, ..., 77. Jim Everett, 78. Corpse of Johnny Unitas, 79. Tim Tebow

   One positive lesson I've learned from this missing plane..... I'm going to start dumping my murder victims in the Indian Ocean from now on.

   Lord....Please send ALL the morons below me back to school!!

   I expect Obama to name himself the new Pope soon.....

   What the hell is a Honey Boo Boo? And can it get me high?

   If you had told me 30 years ago that I'd be talking to strangers on the Internet all day, I woulda told you to shut up and pack another bowl....

   A condom? Come on baby... it's the rapture!

   I'm lovin' my new Air Jordans even if they do smell like Pepper Spray..........

   FYI - If you find bit of the satellite, you have to call the police and someone from NASA (prob Bruce Willis) will come over to collect it, apparently!......

   Memo to New Orleans: You can't turn the Superdome into a sewer this time., emergency shelter will be at Tom Benson's house....

   Blizzard Survival Tip: If anyone in your household makes a "global warming" reference, throw them outside. It's the only way they'll learn.....

   If I hear one more foreigner accusing us of having a "culture of violence" I'm gonna blow their brains out.

   In honor of new Pope, boys underwear half off at Walmart....

   The worst part of getting your Smart Car Tipped is probably trying to win enough Chuck E. Cheese tickets to get another one.....

   The NCAA should allow Penn State to continue playing football, but their scores shouldn't be reported for 15 years.

   The worst part about the Hank Williams Jr remarks and backlash is that Toby Keith will most likely write a song about it now....

   Anthony Weiner: I shouldn't tweet this pic. I'm married. Anthony's weiner: C'mon, do it. Who's gonna know.....

   OK........this is like the third Harold Camping rapture that I've been left behind and frankly it's starting to hurt my feelings : (

   Can't believe 60 Minutes did a whole report on Benghazi w/out interviewing the jerk who's anti-Islam movie got some many people killed...