Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Friday night

   Wife: Have you seen the broom? Me: Where did you put it when you landed?

   We own you.

   Canada gets all our tv shows and movies. From them we get Corner Gas. Mic drop. I win.

   Funny Christmas

   First post

   They should've never given jig-a-boos and women the right to vote. Well, not all women. Not the dumb ones like your mother who also has herpes.

   Canadians are US wannabes.

   Yes. You're not going anywhere. Like always. Except for the handful of talented Canadians who all move here.

   After Christmas

   Canada is ghey.

   why did the chicken cross the road? because it went to the chicken

   "A CULT IS REALLY A CULT WHEN THE LEADER ASKS YOU TO TURN ON FRIENDS AND FAMILY... WHICH BRINGS ME TO YOU, SUDDENLY SAYING TO OUR CLOSEST FRIEND IN THE WORLD, YOU KNOW WHAT? 'FU*K CANADA,' FOR NO PARTICULAR REASON..." - BILL MAHER

   Lamemerica does suck. And we're not going anywhere. This is storage for us. Go f*ck yourself and your dying country 💀

   We took your boring ice hockey and made it profitable. We own you.

   Also praying that 100% of Canucks stop visiting the US. The border towns would be destroyed first 😂 It's at 70%. Pretty sure they'll get there.

   That is your new name!!!!!! LAMEr*ca 🤣 Canadas taint, just above the Gulf of Mexico.

   Okay, you win. We suck. (Will the fruitcake now go away?) Probably not.

   Lamer*ca brags about "defending" E*rope, while depending on them for strategic security, economic benefits and p*litical leverage from its partnership. Looks like Lamer*ca is gonna have to face reality now.

   Praying that 100% of Canucks stop visiting the US. Come on, weirdos... you can do it!