jayson1464 Funny Status Messages

   He's rather listen to an entire series of audio books read by Gilbert Gottfried than to listen to your babbling BS any longer.

   I always thought differently than the other kids in school. Teacher asked us if we could be any animal we wanted what would we be. I said, "A Bird". Teacher said, "So you can fly"? I said, "No, so my sh*t can be white".

   Number 1 drinking rule: NEVER DRINK ALONE... Come on Sponge Bob let's have another drink.

   now friends with Jose Cuervo

   This is my cup of care \_/ oh look, IT'S F**KING EMPTY.

   The old saying "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence"....is it? Or maybe you just need to get up off UR lazy ass and mow the lawn, water it, pull some weeds, fertilize it, take care of your own grass and stop looking over the fence

   poking Osama bin laden to update his location on Facebook.

   His next day off the kids get to pick where we get to go.... Please pick the liquor store... Please pick the liquor store.