Space Monkey Funny Status Messages

   Been watching these 2 black guys shake hands for the past 28 minutes.

   Ron Jeremy is in the hospital... I think I've seen that one before on Redtube.

   Manti Te'o should change his relationship status on Facebook to "It's Complicated"

   To any of you sick guys out there thinking about catfishing me, I'm terrible at texting back and scared of commitment so please just move along.

   We bought a zoo, because we bought some pot.

   Few things raise suspicion like a black guy in a Mercedes with a ski rack.

   My mom just called me and told me she has a new boyfriend. Django could be a white name too, right?

   There's creepy, then there's going to a strip club wearing a windbreaker

   It's kind of cool how khaki Dockers and ugly people found each other

   You mean you guys don't write for TV sitcoms either?