FezzeeLarry Funny Status Messages

   I don't know what's worse: Being caught cheating at a Coldplay concert, or just plain caught being at a Coldplay concert.

   Basketball is like the weather. With either, things can change within a few minutes.

   Being human requires no apologies. Being a jerk does.

   Why does the Old Testament prohibit people from eating pork? Pigs are such friendly looking animals. It's goats that look like the spawn of Satan.

   AI photos are like instant mashed potatoes. You can easily tell they're weird, tasteless and nowhere near the real thing.

   Instead of your New Year resolution centering around smoking and dieting, how about working on not being an asshole?

   2023: Where pizza crusts are made from chicken, hamburgers are made from plants, and milk is made from nuts.

   TikTok. Exemplifying the devolution of mankind one imbecilic post at a time.

   ALDI: "We bring you discounted prices on all your grocery store needs. But, we have to draw the line somewhere, so no plastic bags for you to carry your discounted grocery store needs home."

   I had a nightmare about Peppa Pig. The dad told his family that he got a new job with Oscar Mayer Bacon. 🥓🥓