Funny Status Messages

   If North Korea hits us, I think the Military should kneel down and let the NFL players handle it.

   leave it to Hugh Hefner to die on hump day

   I find it very funny that all the women who say Trump is a sexist pig are saying farewell to Hugh Hefner who did nothing but exploit women all his life....

   Sure I will read Hugh Hefner's obituary. But only for the articles.

   Twitter is going to 280 characters? That is so awesome, T rum p can now piss off twice as many people.

   Y'all. I thought we were all streaking as an homage to Hugh Hefner. Anyway, I'm gonna need bail money. Again.

   I wonder how long it took for the Playmates to realize that Hugh's Viagra had worn off and rigor mortis had set in...

   Any man that dates me better have my beer ready when I get home like my cats do

   Me and Hugh Hefner had a lot in common................we both owned more than one bathrobe.

   To honor Hugh Heffner, all erections will be at half staff today

   Ok, I've never thought much of Hugh Hefner, but you have to appreciate the irony. The creator of Playboy expires on a Wednesday-Hump Day.

   RIP Hugh Hefner. A remarkable life. Fans of his work are now doing something they’re quite accustomed to - grabbing a tissue.

   you Americans have it SO WRONG ON YOUR AIRPLANES. I'm just saying!

   How fitting is it Hugh Hefner died on hump day

   Hugh Heffner...the only person who we can truly say is not in a better place now...

   As a Disabled Veteran let me make my opinion very clear. If you take a knee during the National Anthem you are not disrespecting me. YOU ARE HONORING ME. I sacrificed for your freedom to make that choice.

   "Goodbye, everyone. I'll remember you all in therapy." -Me, leaving a family reunion.

   Technology today is a race between smart people striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof gadgets, and the universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the universe is winning.

   One thing that I have noticed about conspiracy theories is that they all depend on the government perpetrators being endlessly clever. I think you'll find that government perpetrators are endlessly stupid.

   Hugh Hefner dead at 91, Financial news, Kleenex is announcing profit lost for next year.