Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   an appetite for destruction...and he is starving this week

   in trouble for moving all the bibles to the fiction section at Barnes 'N Noble

   knows he was unwanted as a child when he found his bath toys were a radio and a toaster!

   shot a man in Reno just to watch him die

   playing a Rusty Trombone

   the person your mom warned you about!

   would imagine if you could understand Morse Code, a tap dancer would drive you crazy.

   got my hair highlighted, because I felt some strands were more important than others.

   wondering what the hell Jesus ever did for Santa on his Birthday?

   wonders if dyslexic devil worshipers sell their soul to Santa

   A.D.D stands for Attention Deficite....hey look a butterfly!

   wonders if the people who spend £2 each on those Evian bottles know that backwards it spells Naive..

   two wrongs don't make a right but three rights make a left....

   don't drink and drive, you could spill the beer in your car.

   would so kill herself if she believed in reincarnation.

   the reason for the tear drops on your guitar

   going to DEFCON 4

   disobeyed orders

   s eating out.... At home. ;-)

   doesn't want to grow up.... he's a Toys R' Us kid!