Sully Funny Status Messages

   Hey..........all the political and media people are in Iowa. If we could somehow fence it off, this is our chance to start a new society. Who's down???

   Ever notice that the douchebag who says "See you next year!" on New Years Eve is always someone you wouldn't mind not seeing for the entire year?.......

   I wonder what Rebecca Black thinks of Samoa skipping out on Friday?.......

   I'm still hoping Nike will one day come out with an Air Jordan belt....

   I'm lovin' my new Air Jordans even if they do smell like Pepper Spray..........

   Albert Pujols $250M baseball contract is totally unfair. He should give some of those $ to players who aren't nearly as good. WTF, we should occupy his house.......

   Dear Obama, It's ok..... No one believes in me anymore either. Sincerely, Santa

   Breaking: Michelle Bachmann calls for immediate release of US Predator drone pilots downed by Iran......

   At least Herman Cain knows when to pull out......

   Dear Santa I've been good all year! Ok most of the time. I Mean once in a while. Oh...F*ck it, I'll buy my own sh#t.......

   Occupy North Pole, because Santa loves the rich kids more.........

   From this point on I propose that Herman Cain be known as Big Daddy Cain, and that he defend himself by saying 'It's a Big Daddy Thing.'

   Unlike Rudolph, I don't have to visit the Island of Misfit Toys this Christmas. I work there.

   Barney Frank is retiring from Congress to coach football at Penn State....

   So lets be clear ...we have the McRib, Kim Kardashian is single and the NBA is back? Black Guys are winning.........

   Whenever I see the new "Obama 2012" bumper sticker, I immediately assume whoever owns that car has been living on the moon for the past three years......just saying

   Whenever I worry I've been wasting my time on FB, I cheer myself up by remembering I have never seen a Twilight movie.......

   Hey....Admit it, everyone has a little bit of racism in them. When you do laundry, I bet you all separate the colored from the whites......

   I'm thinking Dr. Murray will probably get a harsher sentence since Michael Jackson was white at the time of his death......just saying

   I wish we could all legally divorce Kim Kardashian......