Nobody Funny Status Messages



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   messageicon Behind every successful status update there is : Ctrl+C & Ctrl+V
←Rate | 01-25-2012 02:07 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon I bought a cheese grater for my blind uncle. He said it was the most violent thing he ever read.
←Rate | 02-09-2012 09:57 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon In my dream, I was just about to have sex with Meagan Fox, but my alarm went off. You can say I got clock blocked.
←Rate | 02-09-2012 10:12 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon Facebook's been down for 15 minutes and I'm freaking out because I don't know if anyone's having babies, eating food, or sad about work.
←Rate | 02-09-2012 13:36 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon We are all born sexual creatures; it's a pity so many people despise and crush this natural gift. ~ Marilyn Monroe
←Rate | 02-12-2012 12:00 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon Every so often I like to stick my head out the window and look up and smile for a satellite picture.
←Rate | 02-16-2012 09:47 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon If I had an Australian Accent I would never shut up
←Rate | 02-17-2012 13:54 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon I only live for two reasons: 1. I was born 2. I ain't dead yet
←Rate | 02-28-2012 05:06 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon It's always "going to be okay" when it's not happening to you.
←Rate | 02-28-2012 13:45 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon You know society is screwed up when a 10-year-old girl worries more about her weight than where her friends are hiding.
←Rate | 03-10-2012 04:33 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sexual pleasure (When done right) is a passion to which all others are subordinate, but in which they all unite.
←Rate | 03-10-2012 04:54 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon My dad used to beat me with a camera. I still get flash backs.
←Rate | 03-10-2012 12:53 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon My greatest fear on Monday is greeting someone and asking someone how their weekend went and they actually telling me every mundane details about it.
←Rate | 03-12-2012 13:42 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon There's an evil intention behind every gallon of gas.
←Rate | 03-12-2012 13:58 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon I woke up one day and your name just didn't make me smile anymore.
←Rate | 03-13-2012 12:37 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon 2013. The year when the movie 2012 will be moved from the action section to the comedy section.
←Rate | 03-14-2012 13:20 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon Rearrange the letters to spell an important part of the human body that is most useful when erect: PNESI [A. spine]
←Rate | 03-14-2012 13:25 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon I didn't text you. Vodka texted you.
←Rate | 03-14-2012 13:27 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon Sometimes Karma takes way too long. I would rather beat the crap out of you NOW!
←Rate | 03-15-2012 12:46 by Nobody Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm one boob, you're the other boob and together...we're Breast friends.
←Rate | 03-15-2012 13:13 by Nobody Comments (0)  



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