Funny Status Messages and Tweets

   Rise and shine! What are we melting down about today, lefticles?

   Tesla lost about $38.2 BILLION in market capitalization today. Happy Tuesday, y'all!

   "We want to restore the Department of Justice to an institution that focuses on fighting law and order." White House Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt Hey look. The first truthful thing the bimbo's said yet.

   Nissans are fast, BMWs are faster, but Teslas are definitely the fascist!

   Justin Eichorn now? It's all over the news. You're all the same. Every single one of you.

   And in other news, a Federal Judge has blocked the return of the astronauts to Earth.

   This is how your government has been corrupted: 1) Donors give huge sums to elect politicians to office. 2) Elected officials rewrite the rules in the donors' favor. 3) Donors make a huge profit. 4) Repeat. Great job suckers lol

   In case no one has noticed, it's Caucasian males that virtually built the western world.

   The name Lacrosse has a hidden meaning; it's indicative of the two activities that are 'cross combined' and comprise it: badminton and butterfly collecting.

   Wife: Have you seen the broom? Me: Where did you put it when you landed?

   I remember when you all were funny.

   Of course Hamas has rejected the United States offers. Because he's a terrible negotiator. He's laughed at by most of the planet and no one respects him because he's such a goof.

   It's so funny that we're annoying this one loser so much lmfao

   What's sad is our new leftist extremist has no audience anywhere else, so he's decided to set up shop here. A dying site that hasn't been poignant in years.

   In 3,025 years, life will either be really good or really bad. It's 5050.

   So you guys all have matching white hoods and viagra subscriptions or what?

   So you guys all have matching Hamas scarves or what?

   See? Anything you can do, we can do better.

   Buckle up… if in the next 12 years there's only repuklicans and repedolicans and rapeublicans in office, the United States will lose its superpower title and become a wasteland of embarrassment and failure as other countries cancel it.

   Buckle up…the next 12 years will have no Dem in office. All we do is win on a daily basis now.