Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

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   messageicon Women don't fart until they get married... that's when they get an a$$hole.
←Rate | 10-30-2012 15:32 by Baddie Comments (0)  


   messageicon Just a friendly reminder: There's 51 shopping days before Xmas. Of course according to the Mayans, the world will end in 48 days, so you decide…
←Rate | 11-02-2012 14:18 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Apparently the little box on the up right side of fb seems more interesting than the actual status updates!
←Rate | 11-03-2012 23:09 by Majid Comments (0)  


   messageicon Now that the election is over, we can focus on the REAL issue: Hoes being taken, good girls being single.
←Rate | 11-07-2012 01:49 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Once you realize that someone is rubbing you the wrong way and you are convinced that there will never be a happy ending, you are undoubtedly in a bad relationship or,,,, you are being massaged by a witch.
←Rate | 11-08-2012 05:04 by JestorRodoN Comments (0)  


   messageicon HEADLINE - Bieber & Gomez split up! This was my rock, my reason for living - what is left, my world is crumbling around me - how will I continue living ? Wait.. where am I ? I thought this was an article about Captain Crunch being discontinued.
←Rate | 11-10-2012 12:52 Comments (0)  


   messageicon My Doctor reckons heavy drinking, eating unhealthy foods and obesity stop you having children. Bollocks - try telling that to guests on the Jeremy Kyle show!
←Rate | 11-13-2012 11:29 Comments (0)  


   messageicon Maybe those huge ass snakes just want to give us a tight hug but are really bad at it.
←Rate | 11-25-2012 08:14 Comments (0)  


   messageicon on't name your bong after a woman, because we all know it's wrong to hit women.
←Rate | 11-28-2012 10:28 by StonerDudee Comments (0)  


   messageicon I like the sound of "PSY beats Justin Bieber...in Youtube views" If only he actually physically did it.
←Rate | 12-05-2012 13:45 Comments (0)  


   messageicon CLAUStrophobia = The Fear of Santa Claus !
←Rate | 12-11-2012 13:12 Comments (0)  


   messageicon I would hurt the people that I love for a taco right now.
←Rate | 09-08-2012 14:59 Comments (0)  


   messageicon seen the calvin klein underware ad on youtube, haven't skipped ad in days. Well played YouTube, well played.
←Rate | 09-09-2012 08:53 by jayroc Comments (0)  


   messageicon Respect my lack of authority
←Rate | 09-27-2012 02:43 Comments (0)  


   messageicon The first rule of iPhone 5 club is you tell everyone about iPhone 5 club.
←Rate | 09-28-2012 10:02 by fb/CruelUnusualJokes Comments (0)  


   messageicon I was feeling a little under the weather. But surprisingly, I got down from my desk chair and I felt better? It must have been the high altitude.....
←Rate | 10-04-2012 15:19 by sully Comments (0)  


   messageicon watches Sunday football with you all day... Wife that girl.
←Rate | 10-07-2012 22:06 by BEGO Comments (0)  


   messageicon You're weird, sarcastic, narcisistic, rude and seem like a witch. My only question is, Are free for a date next weekend?
←Rate | 10-14-2012 05:41 Comments (0)  


   messageicon i have a neighbor whos dog doesnt eat peanut butter anymore.. just saying.
←Rate | 10-18-2012 10:37 by joe twilla Comments (0)  


   messageicon I'm really good at hide and seek. Hide my ex's dead body and seek a new girlfriend.
←Rate | 10-20-2012 05:40 Comments (0)  



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