Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   you don't have to say everything you think

   Just saved a bunch of money by switching my insurance to passenger seats

   I just heard that you should never enter into a marriage lightly...Heck, I must have been 275 lbs when I got married! So i'm good,,,

   I spent most of my money on whiskey.hot cars,fast women, and motorcycles....and the rest of it I just wasted.

   Remember you are known by the idiot you accompany.

   legally insane, please dont worry, if you have any worries feel free to call our help line on: 01904 48 1234.

   not a slag he just enjoys sex!!!

   could use a few drinks.....everyday!!

   200 pounds of dynamite with a 3 inch fuse ;(

   decided to donate some fat, any takers??

   thinks that your a great friend but when we're running from the zombies is gonna trip you.

   being a twat, and would advise you to do the same thing

   ......I hope that when I die, people say about me, 'Boy, that guy sure owed me a lot of money.'

   not on speaking terms with his/her liver.

   in a minute, gettin' is gonna be done got - got!

   takes "American Midol" to alleviate the cramping and bloating caused from all the hype surrounding that vapid show.

   brushing his teeth and having so much fun, but he never lets the water run.

   gaming on PS3 with his neighbors pet. Sadly enough the dog is winning.

   I replaced hating everything with Justin Beiber. . .

   If the condom don't fit you must acquit - Darren Sharpers Defense