My dad was a complicated man. He was a huge raclst, my dad, but he still tried to be a good father, you know? Like, he would tell me that Santa Claus was bIack - that way, when I found out he didn't exist, it wouldn't be that big a let down.
Got a flat tire... Pulled over to change it. Stupid guy says, "Did your tire go flat?" I said " No, I was driving along and the other 3 just swelled up!"