Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Republicans haven't said anything about welcoming immigrants.Grrrr!! I might be jumping the fence again.

   Golden domes over mobile homes. Go Irish!!

   If I hear one more time " Liz meet Brad " on You Tube, I am going to star engineering the electricals.

   Obama reminds me of ThomasJefferson. He liked some dark meat, too...

   Glow in the dark condoms.. Now you see it, now you don't! Now you see it, now you don't! Now you see it, now you don't! ...

   A girls r like a mosquito: when it stops making a noise,you know it's up to something.

   out clubbing this weekend. I'm going to beat my record of 12 baby seals

   Behind every successful man is a woman, behind her is his wife

   What's better???????.... A hot woman drinking more than you or that same woman buying you drinks?

   remembers the day when blackberry and apple were just fruit..

   There are two types of people in the world - those who have had Dinty Moore's Beef Stew and those who have not.

   I go where I please...and I please where I go.

   Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it - I don't care.

   "Do they know it's christmas time at all?" Yeah they should. They made most of the presents.

   Every womans' dream is a nice big wedding. Every mans' nightmare is a nice big wedding

   wants to do it like they do on the discovery channel

   just had my LEFT side removed. I'm all RIGHT now

   Patience is the ability to let your light shine after your fuse has blown

   knows that hangovers are Gods way of saying you kicked ass last night.

   WTF It's been 25 something years since Charlie Bucket took over the Chocolate factory,and we are still buying Wonka Bars! I want a damn Bucket Bar! I know wonka picked the wrong kid. Veruca Salt would if had her own bar by know.