Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   Falling In Love With You Is The Second Best Thing I Have Done .. Finding You Is The First ♥ ..

   <--still thinks that chick on the Progressive Insurance commercials is HAWT!

   Forget the $1,200 stimulus check. I rather get a dollar for every lie he has told us.

   RIP Nelson Mandela. Your "I Have A Dream" speech was an inspiration to us all.

   Come on Issac, the convention is about to start, don't let us down.

   Belichick, Brady, & Tebow: The NFL's Father, Son, & Holy Ghost.

   I go for religious girls cause if they believe that stuff imagine what you can get them to do.

   in Napa Valley looking for wine, but should be in the midwest, talking to Repubicans cause no one whines line a Repubilcan.

   Suicide is away of telling God, You can't fire me I quit !!!!!

   I am having the best day of my life and I owe it all to not going to church!!!

   Well, like I said to my television the other day watching Brandon. How can these people be so stupid?

   as often as SCIENCE changes its mind its hard to see truth in anything it says...

   What have a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken got in common, By the time you've finished with the breast and thighs, all you have is a Hot Stinky Box to throw your bone in.

   Pope Benedict XVI to resign because he "no longer has the strength to fill the hole of a boy's orifice"....Sorry... I meant fulfill the roles of his office

   Osama Bin Laden has updated his facebook status. The FBI has left the afganistan/Pakistan border and is now searching for him in Farmville.

   It's Friday 13th. I think I'm going to break a mirror, walk under a ladder, let a black cat walk past me, open an umbrella indoors, spill some salt, wear a hat to bed, step on a crack in the sidewalk.... then call somebody I hate and see if she wants to

   Facebook Trick! Press Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left, Right, B, A, Enter then left click Then Scroll Up And Down up & down and magic circles will appear! lmfao! To stop this - refresh your page THIS WORKS - TRY IT! THEN COPY & PASTE THIS TO YOUR S

   I throw my can up in the air sometimes saying AYO where out of beer YO..

   wishes all the mourners outside Amy Winehouse's home would please form a line? After all it's what she would've wanted.

   I'm not an alcoholic! I just walk around with a mouthful of whiskey, so if someone says something stupid I can spit and light their face on fire.