Forget Trump - Funny Status Messages that are not about Trump

   How did cavemen meet women? They went clubbing.

   FOX needs to hire more women who look like Rachel Madcow. Problem solved.

   If we are just going to hand the election to the person that gets more votes, then democracy is truly broken...sad.

   The only Marx I want to hear about is Groucho

   My kids were very upset to learn that we are eating animals when we eat meat, so they’ve decided to stop. Except for the animals that make bacon, chicken nuggets, and hamburgers.

   I swear to drunk I am not god

   Tony Stewart just announced he has Parkinson's Disease too.

   I still remember 2014 like it was yesterday!

   Kudos to all the GOP Presidential candidates for their 2 days of silence regarding the shooting victims

   I've got some terrible news: FOX

   Why does a Mexican re-fry their beans? Have you ever seen a Mexican do something right the first time?

   Black guys from other countries aren't really "Black Guys"

   Who cares about threats over the internet. You can't be a bada*s with a keyboard. Fighting online is like racing in the special olympics, even if you win you're still retarded.

   Farmers complaining about the drought. Why not just buy corn at the store??..... idiots

   Who says women don't like simple, cheap things..we like guys don't we?

   likes to fill up the bath, then turn the shower on and act like I'm in a submarine that's jus been hit.

   a four time olympic gold medal winner, and a compulsive liar

   dreamed he ate a 10lb marshmellow, when I woke up the pillow was gone!!! WTF

   You are the rain to my showers, the April to my flowers, the fresh to my air, you are the sun to my set, you make my day beautiful.

   i see you poked me, does that mean your dtf?