Tonez Funny Status Messages

   Stupid Question: When people see you lying down with your eyes closed they still ask: "Are you sleeping?" Smartass Answer - "No, I'm training to die!"

   Bristol Palin is payed as an Abstinence Ambassador... Great, now if we can only get Charlie Sheen to speak on alcohol awareness

   am I the only one when my mom enters the room while I am on the computer, switch to goole and just stare at it?

   if you want to post akward moment jokes and not have it redirect spell "akward wrong"

   Damn the government is about to shut down, radio active water in the sea, and the real kicker no NFL.... Yep, Nostradamus is laughing somewhere

   think of a number, double it, add six, half it, take away the number you started with, your answer is three

   The sad moment when you are playing hide and go seek.. you have the best hiding spot... you have to go pee

   I tried to walk into target today but I missed

   the fail moment when you are checking out a girl and he turns around

   the akward moment when you are at a funeral and your phone rings.. you ring tone is "I will survive".

   Watching the x games, live on the toilet on espn, on my iphone... The future is here ppl

   Beer can with a british accent sounds like bacon with a jamaican accent

   I dont care if it is 5 min. till the bell.... I am packing up now !!!!

   Lazy rule #526272828000: I take short cuts that are longer than the long cuts just because I think they are shorter