Mduduzi Funny Status Messages

   Money talks...but all mine ever says is good-bye.

   If you can stay calm while all around you is chaos, then you probably haven't completely understood the situation.

   Chaos, panic and disorder. My work here is done.

   Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich.

   The definiton of success: The achievement of something desired, planned, or attempted: So to be successful, set low standards, to be a failure and frustrated, set very high standards.

   I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn't work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness.

   * Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

   just passed an INCOMPETENCE test with flying colors!

   The only thing I won't eat for breakfast is lunch and supper!

   Stop telling me to stop drinking; even the bible says He brews.

   Who was the best comedian/stage performer in the Bible? ANS: Samson. He brought the house down.

   Working for God does not pay much, but His retirement plan is out of this world

   not an alcoholic, just a drunk that's scared of a hangover?