@mollyfaerie Funny Status Messages

   According to scientists, due to global warming is posing a huge threat to the arabica coffee bean. You know what that means. We're one worldwide coffee shortage away from an actual zombie apocalypse.

   Why are Halloween costumes so skanky??? Sorry Christmas, "ho ho ho" is now a more appropriate greeting for Halloween...

   what can I say? Life doesn't get much better than beer and pancakes after midnight :)

   wondering what the hell is a party rocker? Any WHY are they in my house tonight??

   convinced God made mosquitos and flies just to watch us slap ourselves

   feel so dissed the earthquake missed me. anyone else wanna rock my world?

   NO Katy Perry, I have NEVER felt like a plastic bag!

   moving to Sweden where all the guys are smart enough to realize brunettes are way hotter than blondes

   Some days it's just too hot for pants :)

   Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to write to myself on my wall.