@iTechnoBoy Funny Status Messages

   Dear God, Lets make a trade. Ryan Dunn for Justin Bieber? Love, Everyone.

   WELCOME TO FACEBOOK, the place where relationships are perfect, liars believe they are telling the truth, & the WORLD shows off they are living a great life; where your ENEMIES are the ones that visit your profile the most, your FRIENDS & FAMILY block you

   And on Friday God created alcohol, and Adam was happy! It had been a long first week with Eve

   Dude she has a boyfriend? -Yeah so? Soccer has a goalie ,doesn't mean you can't score ;}

   everyone needs to stop freacking out every time facebook makes a change. its facebook. you'll be ok 

   Dear 12 year old on Facebook, how are you in a complicated relationship? Did someone steal your cookies?

   Dear girls who apply for a job at hooters. Do they hand you a bra and say fill this out?

   Think befor you speak, Google befor you post !

   Relationships are like drugs. They either kill you or give you the best feeling of your life.

   I'm sorry I'm late. I saw a drawing of the sun wearing sunglasses and spent 4 hours wondering what the f**k he was protecting his eyes from.

   Why do porn sites have a "Share to Facebook" button? Who watches porn and thinks, "You know who'd really enjoy this? My family and friends."

   I hate when girls say, "you probably say that to every girl." don't you use the same resume when applying to different jobs?

   $950 for an iPhone 6 off contract’)... Airplane mode better take me on vacation

   I almost had a 3som last night, I just needed 2 more people.

   "LOL" is the new way of saying "I really have nothing to say."