@iTechnoBoy Funny Status Messages

   LADIES: If you don't know ur own worth and value...then do NOT expect someone else to calculate it for u.

   "When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down "happy". They told me I didn't understand the assignment. I told them they didnâ€

   having you ever eaten an apple with a worm in it? well buy an iphone and you will feel like that.

   Don't sacrifice your friends for your "loved one". Because if your "loved one" is making you leave your friends...there's something wrong.

   Aside from Confirm & ignore, friend requests should have a "WHO ARE YOU" button

   Happy Mothers Day to all the stay at home dads

   Dear mom, You may have seen me naked when I was a baby, but that was 15 years ago. Sincerely, please learn to knock.

   People who still call radio stations to request songs are the same people who still updates their MySpace profiles

   If Facebook really did have a dislike button.. some serious drama would go down

   Dear Google, You bring up millions of results, if I don't see what I want on the first page, I asume it's not there Sincerely EVERYONE.

   People who say you "tweet too much" need to take their asses back to MYSPACE cause you won't be seeing anything "too much".

   Dear Nike, I did it. Now what happens? Sincerely, Pregnant teen.

   Don't tell me your sorry when your not, you only say sorry when you get caught.

   Twitter: What's happening? Facebook: What are you thinking? MySpace: Where is everybody?!

   I love watching two girls meet for the first time. Its easily the fakest thing I have ever seen.

   Just because I flirt with you doesnt mean I like you.

   Don't worry about the world coming to an end, it,s already tomorrow in Australia

   I learned 3 things from "Look At Me Now": Chris Brown is getting paper, Busta Rhymes has four tongues, and Lil Wayne doesn't eat sushi

   Buying a ugly fat chick a purity ring is like putting a fence around a dog with no legs

   If people winked in real life as much as they wink in texts, the world would be an extremely creepy place.